The last thing men want to do when it comes to their emotions is to come across as overly needy and end up tripping over themselves in shame. Here are 25 signs that he’s pretending not to like you, even though he really does:
Why Do Guys Hold Back Even If They Like a Girl?
Guys can be weird creatures at times, let’s face it! There is something preventing them from telling you how they feel even though they would like to. You are aware of that, right? Pride, or perhaps it’s better to say fear!
He’s terrified that you’ll throw him back because that will seriously damage his sense of self-worth. Instead, he plays you off as nothing special in the hopes that it will all go away.
Either that, or he believes you will mistakenly ask him out as a result of your psychic ability to detect his reverse psychology. Yes, you are supposed to have ESP as well!
Of course, it’s also possible that this guy had a negative experience in the past and is reluctant to repeat it. Perhaps he simply needs some time to gather his courage once more.
Regardless, developing the ability to spot the telltale signs that he really does like you will aid you in figuring out what is really going on.
Signs He’s Pretending Not to Like You When He Really Does
It happens to the best of us, let’s face it. Most of us have been in a situation where we liked someone but, for whatever reason, we suppressed our feelings and ended any chance of hooking up.
Perhaps this is an ex-friend of yours or, in your mind, you don’t think this person is your type, which isn’t a very good reason.
You avoided them despite your desire to avoid them, despite the fact that they showed interest. The majority of us have come across situations like this before.
But now the other foot is in the shoe. You don’t feel all that great after getting a dose of your own medicine, do you? You’re more likely to go insane because of it.
While some guys are pretty good actors, these are the telltale signs he’s pretending to not like you when he really does!
1. He Spends a Lot of Time With You
Nobody wants to waste time on someone they don’t like. Sure, you’ve got friends. They spend time with you because they appreciate you for who you are. Therefore, this guy likes you at least on the most fundamental level.
But let’s face it, if you get the impression that he likes you and spends a lot of time with you, he likes you. [Read: How to decode his body language and figure out if he likes you]
2. It Feels Like You’re a Couple
Most people mistake your friendship for a romantic relationship. There is a level of comfort you share with one another that you don’t share with your other male friends when you are together.
This connection feels different. If so, there must be feelings involved because you may be more touchy and affectionate than most people.
3. He Makes the Odd Mistake to Show You How He Really Feels
He’s going to make a mistake despite his pretense that he doesn’t like you. That kind of emotion hiding is impossible. He will thus frequently text you or like your social media posts. Additionally, the messages don’t have to be flirtatious in nature to indicate that he is thinking about you frequently.
Focus on what he does because his actions can tell you everything you need to know. Pay close attention because this is one of the telltale signs that he likes you even though he acts otherwise. [Read: The sneakiest ways to get a guy to ask you out]
4. He Blows Hot and Cold
Yes, the conflicting signals. Why are you reading this? He seems to like you, but his behavior is inconsistent.
When he is being overly friendly or revealing too much of himself, he will abruptly change and become incredibly distant. This erratic behavior may indicate that he likes you, but it also indicates that he is unsure of what he wants. [Read: The 3 stages to explain why someone blows hold and cold constantly]
5. He Tries to Get to Know You
A guy won’t waste his time asking personal questions if he doesn’t like you. It makes no sense why he would.
He doesn’t want to get to know you; instead, he wants to either get into your pants and leave, or end the conversation altogether. He won’t take the time to get to know you better.
6. He’s All About Eye Contact
We tend to focus on people’s words rather than their actions when we ought to be paying attention to their behavior. You always seem to catch him staring at you when you’re with other friends or at a party.
And it’s not just a passing glance—he’s actually focusing on you. You do realize that we only look at things we find appealing? Except if it’s a train wreck, in which case you’re not involved. If he’s making frequent eye contact with you while you’re looking for indications that he pretends not to like you, take that as a sign that he’s actually interested in you. [Read: 25 signs your guy friend is falling for you even if he’s trying to hide it]
7. He’s Quiet About Other Women
A man won’t discuss other women in front of you if he likes you. Okay, perhaps he will inspire jealousy in you.
But if he really likes you, he’s not going to talk about any other girl he finds attractive. He will keep that aspect of himself hidden, even if he is acting as though he doesn’t like you. [Read: 30 peculiar signs to look for when a guy likes you]
8. He Gets Jealous
Everyone experiences jealousy, and unless you really concentrate on it, it can be very difficult to control. And even then, a jealous person can be easily identified.
You can’t help but notice a change in his body language and attitude when he sees a guy making advances toward you or asking you out. He might glare at the man, show a little coldness, or even insult him. And if that occurs, he is obviously jealous and showing that he really likes you while acting otherwise.
9. He’s Very Touchy
He never fails to sit close to you, touch you, or give you a hug whenever the two of you are together. Guys won’t just throw themselves onto anyone, what’s this.
One’s emotional state can be greatly predicted by their body language. He likes you more and more as he approaches you. It’s that simple.
10. His Friends Know Their Limits
He and his friends have boundaries around you, and you can tell when you’re hanging out with them. His friends aren’t pursuing you or trying to strike up a flirtatious conversation with you.
He has already instructed his friends to back off, if you notice that. Out of concern that one of his friends might pursue you, he might also keep you away from his friends.
11. He Makes Odd Comments About You Being Together
however, not in the manner you desire. Instead, he will make fun of you and tease the idea of you two being together. But let’s face it, nobody makes jokes about that unless they are thinking about it or have given it some serious thought.
Why is he attempting to hide his feelings if he likes you is the question you should be asking.
12. He Tries to Make You Jealous
Typically, a man will keep his feelings for other women to himself. But occasionally, he might try to make you jealous as well to see how you respond.
If a girl appears out of nowhere, don’t be shocked if he informs you about it right away. The likelihood that it was anything more than a prank to annoy you is very low. [Read: What makes me so envious? How to recognize the hidden reasons & fix it]
13. He’s Different Around You Compared to Everyone Else
Is there something about his behavior that seems a little off to you? He is trying to prevent you from seeing him in his feelings, so he is holding himself back.
He might simply be more interested in and guarded of you, which is a sure sign he’s crushing on you even if he’s acting as though he doesn’t.
14. If You Need Him, He’s There
If you need help, you know he would be there in a heartbeat but he would do it in a way that says “we’re just friends.” The undertone and the desire to assist, however, are telling you something entirely different.
15. He Teases You More Than Everyone Else
He continues to treat you differently from everyone else in this situation. One indication he’s pretending not to like you is if you notice he teases you playful while he doesn’t really do the same with everyone else.
He would deny knowing anything about it and claim that he does it to everyone if anyone ever called him out on it. [Read: How to tease a guy and make him realize how much he likes you]
16. He’s Very Active on Your Social Media But Never Mentions It in Person
He enjoys everything, makes numerous comments, and online chat is incredibly simple. It seems as though a barrier is in the way when you’re face to face though. That’s because he can hide behind his phone or a keyboard when he doesn’t have any inhibitions, but when he’s in person, he’s completely exposed.
17. Other People Assume You’re Together
People who aren’t a part of your inner circle might think that you two are already dating. Perhaps they make a comment about “your boyfriend” and when you tell them that you’re single, they’re surprised.
Often, those on the outside can see what’s happening much more clearly than those in the middle of it. [Should we be together? 14 signs to know for sure if it’s a definite yes]
18. He Comes Alive When You’re Around
Every time you are near him, he seems to have lights turned on inside his eyes and is suddenly sparkling. One of the telltale signs he pretends he doesn’t like you is when he does something he can’t really control, like this.
It could also be the other way around, where he suddenly develops self-consciousness and shyness. In any case, he is trying to act as though he doesn’t care when in reality, he very much does.
19. He Remembers Small Details
When we are not particularly close to someone, we frequently forget certain details about them. So, if he pays attention to you more than anyone else, it shows if he remembers the little things, like your favorite color, dish, or birthday.
20. Your Friends Tell You That He Likes You
If your friends are telling you that he likes you, pay attention to them because, as I said earlier, those outside of the situation can read it better.
Ask yourself why if there are indications that he likes you even though your gut tells you otherwise. If he’s trying to dodge his feelings because of who you are, well, then it’s time to find a new guy.
21. Doesn’t Want to Commit
Yes, it is possible for your guy to really like you but be unwilling to commit to a relationship due to his commitment issues. He desires complete freedom and all of a single man’s liberties.
So, in order to keep you from discovering his true motivations if he ends up dating you, he acts as though he doesn’t like you.
He could be struggling with committing now or in the past. He doesn’t want you to experience that with him because he likes you.
22. You Are in a Relationship.
Although he likes you a lot, you already have a partner. For this reason—among others—he acts as though he doesn’t like you for fear that you two will fight.
He might be reluctant to cross his limits out of respect for you and your partner. Rare are the men like these. Many men who like you don’t give a damn about the man you are with. They are only interested in how much they love you.
Additionally, if the guy you are with is his friend, this might be the cause. Even if the two of you aren’t dating, if he knows that his friend likes you, he might back off.
23. He Cares About How He Looks When You’re Around
Some might even call this guy a slob; he’s not exactly the prim and proper type.
If you’ve ever seen his house or the way he dresses (in photos when you aren’t there), you might not have expected him to be the kind of person who cares much about his appearance (or even his basic hygiene).
But for some reason, whenever you’re around, he always seems to pull himself together. In general, he looks better because of his improved attire, scent, and appearance.
24. He Really Cares About Your Friendship
What exactly is the reason this guy, who clearly has romantic feelings for you, won’t express them?
If he truly cares about you, wouldn’t he prefer to be your boyfriend over just your close friend?
He might just genuinely care about your friendship and wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize it, which is one reason.
He either understands the value of this relationship to you or values it highly himself.
He’s heard all the horror stories about how couples who started out as friends eventually split up, so he’d prefer to forgo the chance to ever be in a relationship with you if it means he can keep you as a friend forever.
25. He’s Slightly Insecure and Loves Your Affirmation
You are aware that you would likely say yes if he asked you out.
You’ve made that point clear to him numerous times, but no matter how hard you try to persuade him to change and grow in your relationship, he just won’t.
He might not think of himself as the kind of guy who could be your boyfriend, for example.
It’s possible that he holds you in such high regard that he has mentally surpassed you and is unwilling to even try.
He simply doesn’t think you deserve him, in his mind. The fact that even your simplest affirmations can make his day better shows that he loves you but doesn’t love himself.
Signs He is Really Not Interested
Concerned that your intuition might be flawed? What if he decides not to pursue you? How do you distinguish between them? If he is into you, there should be no question in your mind that he likes you, claims dating expert Ryan Patrick. A guy who isn’t interested in you usually gives off a bad vibe around you.
A guy will waste his time selfishly if he has no interest in seeing you. He would hardly have time to see you or even speak with you.
He has erratic communication, as you would observe. His texts are brief and uninteresting, as you may have noticed. He never makes sexual advances, so you might occasionally feel like a bother to him.
He might not be as readily available and trustworthy if he doesn’t show any interest in you. He never has time for you because he is so busy. He can’t recall the particulars, like your favorite color. He doesn’t care about your life, so he doesn’t know anything about it.
He doesn’t ask you many questions about yourself or how your day was. Say, for instance, that you explain your anxiety is related to a job interview. He didn’t even text you to check on how it went later that day.
He is unaffected by the way you date. Who you converse with or date is unimportant to him. A guy wouldn’t care if you ever mentioned his name.
Saying that you saw Mark yesterday, for instance, could be used. Mark wouldn’t be the least bit bothered if you listed his attractive qualities.
Final Words
You can tell how someone feels about you by observing their overall energy. Most often, it is something else that women overthink.
Women have every right to want to know how a man feels; they just like to be sure. Think about the disappointment you would feel if a man let you believe that he liked you.
It can be difficult to determine whether a guy likes you or not. Every guy is unique, so what one guy may perceive as a blatant indication that he likes you may be the exact opposite for another. The truth is that you would know if he liked you.