The first text you send to a girl is crucial because it sets the tone for your subsequent text conversations with her. We can all stand to improve our approach when learning how to text a girl for the first time, regardless of our level of experience.
Everything you need to know about effective first texts and how to structure them will be covered in this article. Settle in and continue reading; by the end of this lengthy article, you’ll have all the knowledge you need to start increasing your text conversion rate with women, starting with the very first text.
Why is the First Text to a Girl So Important?
You can employ a variety of approaches in your first text to a girl, and only you will know which one will work best for her. Do you intend to flirt with her? Romance her? Make her laugh? Play it cool?
A girl will judge you based on your first text by how you respond to her in subsequent texts. Your greeting, the use of emojis, the number of kisses you give at the end (or whether you give any kisses at all) will all directly affect whether or not you receive the response you are hoping for.
You should therefore consider your decision carefully before sending. The situation won’t always be this dramatic, of course.
Your text exchanges with a girl are crucial to developing a connection with her.
Everything will be much simpler once you’ve gotten the hang of texting her and are exchanging messages. But the initial text? Let us help you out.
How to Text a Girl for the First Time
It can be nerve-wracking to text a woman for the first time. It’s normal to feel a little uneasy, particularly if she’s a pretty woman. You’re not settling for anything less than you deserve, that’s what it means.
Regardless of how long she stays in your life, you deserve a cute girl who enhances it with her bright personality.
It’s okay to be anxious if you’re anxious about sending that first text or if you spend a lot of time thinking about what to send or how to send it.
1. Make Sure She Gave You Her Number
Obtaining her phone number from a different guy or one of her friends is insufficient. She will be extremely irritated as soon as she receives the text because it is extremely creepy. To text a girl, therefore, ask for her phone number directly.
Before requesting her phone number, you could become friends with her on social media and start messaging there. It must originate from her in either case. In that case, you don’t appear in any way strange or ominous.
2. Keep It Simple to Start
You don’t want to ramble on about your life in ludicrous detail when you first meet someone. You’ll feel like you’re approaching her way too strongly, which might make her flee.
If you want to learn how to text a girl for the first time, keep it simple and avoid trying too hard.
If you want to start a conversation, perhaps ask her about her day. It’s a respectable beginning that doesn’t suggest you’re straining too hard.
3. Ask Some Meaningful Questions
Believe us when we say she’s bored of the same old, “what’s up?”
As a result, while you should keep the conversation simple at first, as soon as it gets going, start asking questions that are deeper and more meaningful. It demonstrates that the conversation has some kind of substance, which is why girls love it.
Inquire about her hobbies and whether she’d like to pursue them professionally in the future. You could also inquire about her thoughts on a significant event that is taking place in the world. You won’t tire her out with these excellent questions, so use them!
4. Keep Any Sex Jokes to Yourself
Observe carefully because this one is important. Don’t text any sex jokes if you’re trying to figure out how to text a girl for the first time. Even if it’s just a joke to you, she might take offense or feel disrespected by it.
In the first place, you don’t yet understand her sense of humor, and in the second, she’s still getting to know you. Any chances you have with her will be lost if you try because she will believe you only want her for sex.
Keep them to yourself, then.
5. But Still Make Some Jokes
On the other hand, you still want to get her to smile. She will gladly join in on your laughter as long as the jokes aren’t sexual in nature. Additionally, you are welcome to send her funny videos and memes!
To avoid ruining your chances of connecting with her, just be careful not to crack any offensive jokes.
6. Let Her Lead the Conversation at Some Point
You texted her, and while it might be tempting to take control and start asking her a lot of questions to get her talking, you should also give her some time to speak. This aids in determining how interested she is.
Let the conversation flow naturally if you want to learn how to text a girl for the first time. Initiating conversation is another indication that she enjoys speaking with you. If that weren’t the case, she wouldn’t want to speak any further.
7. Ask About Her Hobbies
A girl’s hobbies are something you should always inquire about. And don’t let her give you the same old, “I enjoy watching movies.”
Ask her if she has any interesting hobbies rather than being hesitant and pressing her a little. You can also share some of your own interests with her to encourage further conversation.
Even better if you can find some areas of agreement! You’ll have something to talk about from this point on to keep the conversation going.
8. Compliment Her Intelligence at Some Point
She’ll eventually grow weary of hearing you compliment her appearance if you do so frequently. Telling a girl you like the way her mind works in a first-time text message will make her think of you.
She will certainly want to speak with you more after hearing that. There’s something alluring about a man who appreciates your intelligence and knowledge while showing concern for how your mind functions.
It also conveys to her the idea that you value inner beauty in addition to physical beauty.
9. Stay Playful and Flirty
Avoid getting too serious during the conversation. It’s acceptable to occasionally bring up sensitive subjects, but try to keep the conversation light-hearted. She will see how upbeat you are through this, and that is always a desirable trait.
However, you shouldn’t engage in overt flirtation with her until she feels at ease speaking to you. She’ll enjoy your playful and flirtatious side if you handle this correctly; she might even like it!
10. Give Her a Chance to Ask Questions
The act of asking questions repeatedly is one thing that men have a tendency to do too much of. Without you ever introducing yourself, she responds to your questions, you ask another, and she again responds. Her chance to ask you a question should be given.
There should be two sides to every conversation. As a result, if you want to learn how to text a girl for the first time, let her ask. She ought to get to know you the same way that you get to know her, right? After all, that is how a conversation operates.
11. Use Some Emojis, for Goodness’ Sake!
This demonstrates to her that you’re silly. Use some well-placed emojis and emoticons to keep the conversation light and entertaining. If you know how to use them correctly, you can really make her laugh.
Girls dislike texting guys who are too stiff because they find them uninteresting. Emojis can be used, just not too many of them, unless you’re discussing something serious.*
12. Leave Her Wanting More
Don’t ask to hang out to end the conversation. Inform her that you must leave but would love to talk later. And finish a fantastic conversation by doing this. She might be a little irritated, but in a good way.
In essence, you’re using the element of the chase in your texts, but obviously don’t do it too frequently or you’ll scare her away forever!
13. Match Her Energy
If you want to learn how to text a girl for the first time, this is among the most crucial things to keep in mind. When a guy doesn’t have the same level of enthusiasm as a girl, she will likely get bored and stop texting him.
Try to match her energy level if she often texts with a lot of vigor. She will be grateful that you are doing this when she notices that you are attempting to tap into her energy.
14. Less is More
To keep her interested and create a strong first impression, you don’t need to text her a lengthy paragraph. In this case, less is more. When texting her, be succinct and straight to the point.
You won’t hold her interest if you text her a lengthy paragraph. Regardless, when saying something lengthy in person is preferable to text, isn’t that right?
15. Exchange Stories
The best way to keep her interested during text conversations without making her bored is to tell her stories. Additionally, it’s a great opportunity for the two of you to get to know one another.
Exchange amusing tales with one another if you’re unsure of how to text a girl for the first time. It’s much better than asking her what she’s doing over and over again in texts—you’ll irritate her if you do that!*
16. Show Off Your Personality
It’s not necessary to be so formal and formal in your text exchanges with girls. What’s the point of texting if you won’t reveal your true personality as you get to know one another?
Don’t be afraid to make her laugh, show her your humor, and show who you really are.
The best part of this is that she thinks you’re cute in real life. Show it to her rather than hiding it! Your best opportunity to leave a lasting impression is right now.
17. Stop Overthinking Everything
It’s critical to not overthink things if you truly want to learn how to text a girl for the first time. You run the risk of texting the wrong thing the more you overthink.
If you text her the wrong thing, she will read it whether you like it or not because texts do not have an undo function. Simply unwind and follow the conversation’s natural course.
18. Keep It Light and Casual
Even though what we just said seems to contradict this, bear with us. You can ask her insightful questions, but you need to keep things informal.
Asking her about her upbringing or the nature of her parents’ marriage should not be taken too seriously.
On your first date or when you get to know each other better, save these topics. Maintain a straightforward conversational flow until then.
19. Avoid Shortcuts
We’re confident that you are able to finish a sentence without the use of abbreviations or shortcuts. Therefore, you should avoid shortcuts if you want to learn how to text a girl for the first time. Don’t use any shorthand; simply text your entire idea.
It’s not all that difficult, is it? Some girls base their opinion of you on how you text, particularly if you overuse slang. Get this right because it’s important.
20. Get Busy
It’s simple to get anxious while waiting for a girl to respond when you first text her. But a guy who sits around waiting for a text because he has nothing better to do is also not attractive.
Let’s move on and live our lives! She will enjoy the tales you tell about your day if you lead an interesting life while you’re at it.
21. Revisit Your Previous Conversation
It’s likely that you’ve spoken to her at least once before sending her a text message because you have her phone number. Why else would you have her phone number in the first place?
Therefore, you can always go back to your previous conversation if you are having trouble coming up with something to say at the moment. Maybe you were mentioning your preferred pizza.
So, inquire if she has had any recently. Anything you can recall from your previous discussion will do. That you even remembered your initial conversation will impress her.
22. Talk About Your Common Interests
Ask her about her interests and hobbies if you don’t know her well. After some time, it’s likely that you’ll share her interest in something. In order for you both to have a lot to say about the subject, concentrate on those.
Discussing topics that are important to both of you helps to strengthen your relationship. Everyone enjoys finding things in common with others because it makes relationships easier and makes you feel good.
23. Ask for a Recommendation
Saying that you’re bored and want to watch a movie might be appropriate. So, inquire as to which one is her favorite and why. After that, you can talk more about other movies you like and other things.
However, it is not necessary to suggest a film. It might be a new restaurant or a drink to try, for example. This makes it easier to bring up your shared interests and favorite topics of conversation.
24. Set Up a Date to Meet Her IRL
Listen, most girls already have enough friends to text; they don’t need more. Some guys send too many texts before actually asking the girl out.
It’s true that people today frequently rely on their phones or laptops for their virtual relationships in this technological age. However, you ought to still be in contact with her on a personal level. Be bold, then, and start pursuing her!
25. Stop Waiting for Validation
Some guys are too timid and try to look for any and all indications that she is interested in them because rejection is never easy. But it’s possible that you won’t get that from her. It’s hard to tell if some girls are just being friendly or flirty.
So, just put up with it and act as though she likes you. Also demonstrated will be self-assurance, which all girls find attractive in a guy.
You don’t want to appear weak, and waiting for her approval will only make you look weak.
26. Make Her Feel Comfortable
She may, in your opinion, be the sexiest woman to ever walk the earth. While texting a girl, you don’t want to appear creepy. Giving her compliments is one thing, but highlighting how hot and sexy she is to talk about is another.
Instead of making her uncomfortable, you want her to feel at ease when speaking with you. Therefore, act nice, funny, sociable, and interesting. Anything you do should not encourage her to avoid your texts at all costs.
Avoid Those Obvious Mistakes
This advice alone may seem obvious. The truth is that we’re all guilty of occasionally losing ourselves in our own thoughts and becoming fixated on insignificant details. When we do that, it is simple to overlook errors that we will later regret.
Slow down if you ever find yourself at a loss for words when deciding what to text a girl for the first time. Consider the situation from the viewpoint of a third party. What guidance would you offer a friend who was sending you this text? From the outside, does it still look like a smart move, or is it just too dull? Too filthy? Too long?
Keep in mind that there is no set period of time for this. A situation where she won’t text back is easily created by rushing.
You should be very casual, straightforward, and direct in your first communication with a woman. In most situations, sending a protracted message or starting a conversation right away is extremely overwhelming and will likely hurt your chances of connecting with her.
You can say things like, “Hello Anna, this is Mike, and it was nice meeting you today.”
But avoid saying something like, “Hello Anna, this is Mike. We met last night at Winehouse. Meeting you was wonderful. I hope everything went well when you returned home. What are you doing today?” Even though the second example’s sentiment is lovely, it is far too much for a first text.
Once she responds to your initial text, you can divide it into two or three separate texts. Even if it seems insignificant at first, she is making an emotional investment when she responds to your messages, despite how small it may seem.
The First Text Message to a Girl You Don’t Know
If you’re into online dating, in particular, this is the most typical scenario you’ll run into. Since you don’t know each other yet, you’re making a good first impression by striking up an interesting conversation.
Here are some quick ideas to help it go off without a hitch every time.
Ask Questions
Inquiring about someone is a great way to learn more about them. Since everyone finds it easy to talk about themselves, it keeps the conversation interesting.
You’re setting the tone for subsequent texts by showing interest in her and starting things off with a straightforward, amusing question. You’re not asking her to do too much right away, and it’s easy and effective.
Keep It Interesting
This can seem like the most challenging aspect of texting at times. You should steer clear of a dull opener when writing good first texts.
For example, the most common complaint I hear from women on dating apps is guys just saying “hi”. It doesn’t take much to get better from there when the bar is set so low, right?
Ask a question to get things going. Mention a unique detail from her profile or your initial meeting. If it’s your style, add some humor. Whatever you do, don’t just say “Hi Amy” and leave it at that.
Not only is this text so simple to ignore, but you’re also placing the onus on her to think of an original response. Depending on her personality, if she replies to that lazy text at all, it’ll probably be with a “hi”. It can be quite difficult to wrangle an interesting conversation out of that exchange.
Conversation Threading
From her very first response, this is a skill that will improve your overall dating experience. Finding topics in her response that you can use for your subsequent response is called conversation threading.
After some repetition, it will come naturally to you, and you won’t have any trouble carrying on a conversation indefinitely. Look at the link and try incorporating it; you’ll pick it up quickly and become a much better conversationalist as a result.
Texting a Girl for the First Time and Creating Attraction
This is where the rubber meets the road, as the saying goes. Let’s look at some instances of how to confidently begin texting a girl. There are some great books out there that are worth looking at to help if you are having trouble with your overall confidence around women.
Keep Your Conversation Short and to the Point
Do you really need to be texting this girl all the time? She must believe you have to even if you don’t. Because of your popularity and the large number of women vying for your attention. She must think of you as a limited resource.
When there isn’t enough of a resource to meet demand, scarcity results. A desert suffering from a drought, for instance, has a limited supply of water.
You are the scarce resource in the dating world. You can share some of your time with her, but definitely not all of it.
She’ll want you more the less accessible you are. I’m not telling you to ignore her calls at all. You can convey that you have more important things to do than to spend the entire night chatting by keeping your texts succinct and to the point.
Stop Waiting for Validation
When texting women, many guys are hesitant. Many people are hesitant to approach a girl because they want more assurance that she actually likes them. If this is you, just think about how many texts you have to send and receive before you feel confident enough to take action.
She’s probably just waiting for you to take action. However, if you are too shy to make the first move, your texting relationship changes from potential love interests to close friends.
This will be your texting relationship soon enough: “Hey, it’s my old texting buddy Matt, back for another round of late-night texting!”
If you keep a text conversation going too long without making your intentions clear, you’re practically asking to be put in the dreaded friend zone. Make a move right now instead of waiting for approval. Let her know “this is the reason I’m texting you.”
You don’t just text for fun. She probably has a dozen guys in her back pocket that she texts for fun. You must be the one person she texts because she is romantically interested.
Be Assertive
Let’s throw out all concepts of being the “nice guy”. The key word here is assertiveness. This is particularly true when you ask her out on a date. Keep in mind that the entire purpose of texting a girl you like is to invite her out on a date.
Be unlike many men who hesitate to act when the time is right. The majority of men have no idea how to ask a woman out or what they want. The end result: something like this happens:
“A movie date sounds like a good idea if you have some free time. When you’re free and all, that is.”
How many of us have texted our significant others embarrassing texts like this one? It reads, “Not sure of yourself, fumbling and over-accommodating.”
Let’s take a look at a more assertive version of that same text:
“Hey Kyla, let’s go check out the new bar on the seventh Thursday. It’s worth the walk, I’ve heard.”
This is a happy middle ground between begging for her time and trying to be some “alpha dog” that barks orders at her. You’re making the plans in a forward, casual manner without all the self-deprecating “maybe, if you’re free or something” nonsense.
Make Her Feel Comfortable
It’s crucial to make a woman feel at ease in order to keep her interested in the conversation. I’m sure we’ve all experienced it: you’re texting a woman, and all of a sudden, out of nowhere, she stops responding.
You ponder what the heck happened as you sit there. Was there something you said? Maybe you did something to cause it?
Women will typically interact with a man only if they are at ease. She will simply ignore your texts if you do anything to make her feel uneasy. Every day, it occurs.
She might feel that way for any number of reasons. Maybe she took offense at a sexual allusion you made. Maybe she didn’t feel a connection with you.
In any case, you need to establish a sense of comfort with the girl in your first text to make it successful.
Make Your First Text An Easy Introduction
Now that you are aware of the primary blunders to prevent when texting a girl for the first time, you can concentrate on sending that crucial first text.
You must also make sure not to overthink the situation. Any attempt to elaborate on your opening message might come across as overly eager, which might turn her off. Less is more – keep it simple, like these for instance:
“It was nice to meet you yesterday, Emily. This is Jon.”
“James: It’s nice to meet you tonight.”
“Hey, Jess. Guess who ;)”
As you can see, the circumstances surrounding how you obtained her phone number will alter the tone of your initial message.
The last example implies that you just got her number; this is a good message to send a few minutes after getting a woman’s number through online dating. If you two struck up a light-hearted conversation at first, she might even play along.
Because you can start a conversation once she is a little more interested, you are essentially fishing for that first response with the other messages.
You would be making the error we previously mentioned if you attempted to start a conversation with her right away in your first message.
Create Some Magnetic Attraction
It takes a while to start attracting a girl after your first text. You’re putting yourself in a fantastic position to escalate from there when you get the conversation off to a strong start.
Keep the conversation light-hearted. whenever you can, make fun of her. Encourage her to discuss herself.
Her questions are a telltale sign that she is interested, so pay attention when she asks them. It indicates that she is not merely playing games with you. As soon as you’re ready to ask her out, all you have to do is start texting her in preparation for your first date.
It’s not as difficult as you may have been led to believe to learn how to text a girl for the first time. You shouldn’t make any avoidable mistakes if she’s a warm prospect, which she should be given that she gave you her number.
What Are Some Conversation Starters for Texting a Woman?
When done correctly, text flirting can be a secure and enjoyable way to meet new people without feeling obligated. The problem is doubled when you start a conversation over text, though. Get her phone number first. Second, you must deliver the goods.
These are practical advice that will help you start a normal text conversation or start a date on your preferred hookup app (if you don’t have a favorite yet, check out the tried-and-true hookup apps we’ve been using).
The good news is that these issues can be solved. Part of learning how to start a conversation over text is understanding how to get her phone number. Let’s examine your strategy for getting a date with a woman you just met or even someone you know well.
The First Text You Send
Once you have her phone number, you might feel pretty good about yourself. But once you realize the hard work has only just begun, this feeling might fade. You now need to choose what to say in order to initiate a text conversation. Additionally, you must decide when to text her.
Fortunately, it’s much simpler to respond to the second query. You immediately send her a text message. Ideally, she’ll text you back with a message that mirrors yours. You’re prepared for text number two if she does or even if she doesn’t.
A Good Conversation Starter for Texting: Ask An Open Question
As we discussed earlier, maintaining an interesting conversation is so easy when you ask questions. An answer that is descriptive is required for open questions. Basically, anything which can’t be answered with a one-word response, like “Yes” or “No.”
You’ll have plenty to text about if you already know her from college or from being friends with her.
“Did you get the specifics about the homework assignment? I believe I did not.”
“For the meeting on Thursday, what do we need to do in advance?”
“Did you hear about Tom’s ordeal?”
Ask a question you’re confident she can answer in order to get the best results. You want to help her feel at ease sending and receiving texts from you. You’re also launching a natural text flow that might lead to additional topics and passions.
Show You Like Her in a Discreet Way
You’ll want to show her you like her after three or four volleys have been exchanged (because you want to keep the conversation going and she’ll get bored if you don’t respond right away). People tend to remember specifics about one another when they are interested in them. Additionally, they focus more on what the person has said.
Asking her a question about something she said or requesting some information about her will demonstrate your interest.
“The following week, my brother will visit Miami. You didn’t say your family members reside there, did you?”
“A brand-new Disney store is opening. I believe I heard you mention that you were a huge Disney fan.”
“Do you have any suggestions for good restaurants in (her area)?”
You can be more direct and let her know she’s on your mind if you’re feeling bold and you notice that some flirting has already begun.
“I saw a woman today wearing your perfume as she passed me. I had to pause and look. I figured it might be you.”
These are the subtle cues that allow her to sense your interest in her without having to immediately respond to your advances. The majority of women need a few days to consider a man before deciding whether or not they genuinely like him. She’ll begin to consider the possibility that you might like her if you sow the thought in her mind.
Find a Shared Interest to Bond Over
We frequently don’t realize how much in common we are until we start interacting with people on social media. It’s great if your phone number switch encouraged more online communication. What unites the two of you is now clear.
Please only read the most recent posts, just a word of caution. Receiving a notification that someone you hardly know has been looking through your old photos is one of the creepiest and most unsettling things you can do. Her sense of being cyberstalked will increase if you bring up old interests.
Simply take a look at what she’s currently posting and use it to establish a connection.
“Your cute dog caught my eye in your feed. I have a retriever that was adopted. Where are you going to walk him?”
“You appeared in that photograph, was it not? Did you go to the Modern Art Museum? I just got there.”
“Is that picture of your mother or sister?”
Especially if you use the last one. She might laugh, and she might even show her mother the message. She starts to support you out of the blue after receiving a compliment!
Things Not to Say When Flirting over Text
We need to go over some things you shouldn’t say when texting a girl for the first time before we move on to asking her out. There will be times when you run out of words, but we’ve already covered some conversation starters for texting and how to get it going. Perhaps she just texted you, and you want to text back right away but are stumped as to what to say. Perhaps you just received the number and are unable to identify any common interests. Just inquire with her.
“You exude a great sense of kindness. Do you have a soft spot for animals? Do you have any pets?”
Most women won’t reply by claiming that they are unkind. So this could start a discussion about what kind of pet she’d like.
Take a step back and give it some thought if you’re not sure what to say. In early texts, it’s never okay to just send a “Hi,” or an emoji. You come across as uncreative and lazy when you write this kind of text. However, including an emoji in a text that contains two or more sentences can help to amplify the emotion. Additionally, never text her while intoxicated. The next day you’ll regret it. The same is true if you text her at odd hours of the night. Emoticons won’t get you a date; try something else.
Seek out some women’s dating advice online or in a reputable dating book if you’re really interested in learning what she’s looking for. You might pick up a few tips.
It’s Time to Ask Her Out
You’ll be prepared to ask a woman out now that you are familiar with a few texting conversation starters. You can scroll back to see what you’ve already said, which is a great feature of text dating. In order to make your date request seem more natural, you can customize it.
“Has that eatery on Madison ever served you? Would you consider it too forward of me to invite you to dinner there on Thursday night?”
You can find everything you need in this request. She is aware of the time and place; it is specific. Importantly, it’s also friendly and it contains a question that can’t easily be answered with a “No.” To what aspect is she objecting? She’ll have to give it some thought.
In general, you want to give her enough time to prepare or change plans if necessary between asking and the date. For instance, making a coffee date during the day can be done right away.
“Would you like to join me for coffee in the park? Such an exquisite day.”
On the other hand, it is preferable to inquire about a dinner date a day beforehand.
“Are you available tonight? I’d love to take you to this fantastic new restaurant I saw in the neighborhood.”
I personally never set a date more than five days in advance. You two may have started dating someone else by then.
In the end, some guys just naturally know how to start a text conversation, while others need practice. When you first start texting women, don’t anticipate becoming a master flirt overnight. You will improve over time because it is an art form. Just be willing to try.
Final Reminder for That First Text to a Woman
And finally, picking up where your last conversation left off in your first text is a fantastic strategy.
You won’t always be able to do this, but remember it nonetheless. You may have teased her once or twice on her drinking and her “catty” behavior. Adapt to your own particular circumstance; sometimes a clever first text can be very effective. Otherwise, as we previously mentioned, you can’t go wrong with something informal.
The Five Stages of Texting a Girl (Recap)
You can find the five steps to messaging a woman you want to date below, along with advice for each.
Stage 1: How to Text a Girl for the First Time
Instead of calling a woman after you meet her, send a message to re-establish contact. For her, responding to a message doesn’t require as much dedication.
Within 24 hours of your initial meeting, send your first message. This makes sure she retains as much information as possible about you and the positive feelings she experienced when she first met you.
In your first message, use callback humor as a way to reintroduce these positive feelings. Anything that makes mention of a conversational exchange that made her laugh during, send.
If you’re stuck for ideas, then send something simple like “I’m [name] and nice to meet you. Good night, [Your name].”
Keep in mind that your goal in sending her the first message is not to arouse her or extend an invitation to a date. You merely want to establish contact at this point and receive a response.
Stage 2: Increase the Frequency and Intensity of Your Texts
The next step is to increase the frequency and impact of your messaging in order to increase her investment in you.
Maintain the flow of the conversation by introducing yourself and by posing questions that will elicit straightforward answers from her.
Avoid divisive subjects that could put a conversation to an abrupt end or destroy her attraction to you.
Her messaging ought to be getting more frequent and more intense along with yours, ideally. She obviously has a growing interest in you if she is doing this. Be careful not to spam her with lengthy messages because doing so can make you appear desperate and turn her off completely.
Stage 3: Maintain Or Build Attraction
Logic does not create attraction; emotion does. When texting a girl for the first time, it’s best to use lighthearted messages that presumptively are familiar, contain wit or humor, or are flirty without making her feel uncomfortable.
It’s great to incorporate playful assumptions about her character, callback humor, teases, and funny memes. You should continue to be unpredictable and challenging enough to keep her interested during this phase.
Stage 4: Maintain Or Build Comfort
Since comfort-building is primarily accomplished by acting as a positive, non-threatening environment in her life, maintaining and establishing comfort is actually simpler than establishing attraction.
Exchange social media accounts with her for the best comfort-building results. She gains more insight into your life and yourself in this way. She can (hopefully) see for herself that you’re a cool guy with lots of friends who doesn’t look like a dangerous creep.
Additionally, comfort can be created by any amusing and lighthearted messages that brighten her day without making her feel pressed.
Send us any cool things that happen in your day, whether they be pictures or videos. This greatly enhances the perception of what dating you would be like. She should become less apprehensive about the prospect of meeting up with you as she gets to know you better and become more invested in you.
Stage 5: Maintain Or Build Comfort
You’ll start to recognize patterns with time and with the help of your intuition, so you’ll know when to ask her out. bIn the meantime, you can test her commitment level without too much risk by using a technique called “baiting.”
A vague or low-pressure text about the two of you meeting up serves as the bait most of the time. It resembles touching a woman’s arm while speaking to her. She will answer if she is genuinely interested. If not, you haven’t lost any time and can continue your work right where you are.
Here are some examples of non-specific invitations:
“Next week, let’s meet up…”
“I’ll start cheating on you if we don’t get together soon.”
“We should get together with you guys this weekend.”
“You should bring your friends and stop by X bar where we will be.”
She needn’t be overly invested in you to concur that this is a wise move. If she does, you can move forward and formulate more detailed arrangements. You haven’t really lost out if she declines the invitation because the plans were either vague or something you were going to do anyhow.
Success in Texting a Girl Isn’t 100% Guaranteed
It’s important to keep in mind that you don’t have to win a woman over by phone. The real draw can only be experienced in person. You simply need to persuade her to meet you for a date over the phone. It shouldn’t require weeks of back and forth. Most guys take too long to make the first move and ask a girl out.
It doesn’t necessarily mean your relationship is over if you ask her out and she declines the invitation. In the five stages of messaging, you probably aren’t as far along as you thought you were.
Simply continue creating comfort and attraction, and then send another invitation later. There’s still a good chance she wants to meet you as long as she’s responding. Timing is very important. The social calendars of attractive women are typically full.
There are plenty of other fish in the sea if she stops responding or makes it clear she doesn’t want to meet at all.
To avoid texting a specific girl too frequently and turning her off, make sure you’re out meeting new women and making new contacts all the time.
Final Words
You’ll find it simple to text a girl for the first time if you follow the rules. The examples provided in this manual should be used appropriately as well.
There is no set format for texting a girl; you can use SMS, Instagram, or even your preferred dating app. The quality of your dialogue with her is most important.
Use the channel that best suits you and your partner. Do you have any advice you’d like to impart?
Let’s start a discussion by posting them in the comments section.